are can be mean.
are can be self-centered.
People love to pull the “I’m going through more shit than you” card to belittle the people around them. This may a conscious effort, or it may not be. Personally, this shouldn’t be a competition we have. I’m guilty of it too; don’t think I’m not. However, I only pull it when I know for almost fact that I am going through more than they currently are.
Side tangent: Most people actually don’t know my daily life. They can think they do, but very few know. While in my senior year of one of the hardest majors among all colleges (physics) I wake up [usually] at 5:30am to workout (unless injured) then move on with my day until roughly 8 or 9pm; then it’s homework time. Two jobs totaling an average of about 26 hours a week. Full class load along with all that homework. Job interviews. Research. Tutoring middle school students. A, now, long distance boyfriend whom I love dearly. Housework. Emails. Eating food somewhere in there. Out of classroom requirements. Group meetings. Maintaining my close friend relationships. And some how keeping myself sane. How do I do it? I just do. I like to keep busy. So when I say “I have no time”, more often than not, I legitimately don’t have time. This also neglects medical issues in which I will not discuss.
Regardless, I didn’t say that to pull the “I really am going through more shit than you” card. I said it because if I didn’t, you wouldn’t know. When people pull this card, they usually are looking for sympathy because they just don’t want to face what they have to. Fair, but sometimes sympathy isn’t deserved.
I guess the reason behind this post is think before you speak. I don’t pull this card often because I don’t know what people are going through. I have friends dealing with: children, their parents facing cancer, their own serious medical issues, not being able to work because of school and more. I don’t know what that’s like. Imagining isn’t usually as close as experiencing. All of the friends I just referenced above, they never pull the “I’m going through more shit than you” card. Never. Maybe a few times when they’ve been fed up with society’s selfish ways, but other than that, they just do. They handle it and keep going, because they almost have to. I know I’m a strong individual, but so are they. They are so strong for continuing their life and not giving up. So strong for being the kind and caring people they are; they would do anything for someone else before themselves. They could so easily just end it, which is sad. No one should ever have to resort to that, or have friends and family deal with the aftermath…
Just think before you speak, it does much more good than you think.
Thanks for reading,